Has it really been just over two months since my partner and I separated? Every day seems so long, and yet as I look back, it seems like time has rushed by. At the end of August I was laying in bed all day and catching up on as many series on Netflix as possible, under the guise of doing research for my film auditions. Life was the pits. My (ex) partner could attest to that. We lived together and we weren’t happy. Then, as if out of nowhere (although we could both feel the shadow of the end looming for a while) she made a brave choice and decided to stake it out on her own.

We both still care about each other, and in a way it’s been hard (obviously) but since then I’ve lost myself in Nashville and gotten the blues, meditated in silence for a week and a half in Washington state, and returned home to beautiful Vancouver BC only to begin some very promising writing projects, not to mention my life as an acting teacher. Life is still in stasis, since my true passion is getting back on stage, but at least now I can see the light.

Kitty Kitty
shot from a production of Kitty Kitty

It’s not that people mean to, but when you share your dream with others, sometimes they tell you, if subtly, what it is appropriate to dream for. As an actor, obviously the major league is the only way to go. Hollywood or bust. Broadway or the highway. Something like that. I feel ashamed for an instant for having fallen for that reasoning, and then I set my sights on the future. Why did I choose to act? I could have been anything. There’s a free PDF book available at http://www.artistsu.org about making a sustainable career for yourself that rightly points out the fact that artists are artists because they can learn how to do anything. So there’s my answer. Acting was the obvious career choice because it would allow me to do everything eventually. And I’ve played a myriad of roles already. But, more importantly, as artists I feel we have a responsibility to communicate some truth about the world to our audiences. So, as an actor, I should practice what I preach. I chose acting because it allows me to live an interesting life, as should we all.

Yet I’ve spent years foregoing travel opportunities to wait for that big audition that may skyrocket me into stardom. One trip to Nashville, and I’m cured of the need for validation. I’d rather eke out a living touring shows and meeting strange and wonderful people. If Hollywood notices, fine, I’ll stop off there for a while. I have no idea what the future looks like for me yet, it’s just started unfolding again after too long in suspended animation, but my guiding light shall be to follow the unusual path. I still love my ex and so I wish her an interesting life too, hopefully one where we’ll be able to knock together like billiard balls from time to time as we traverse the world, and catch up on all the wonderful things we found there.

I had a mentor when I was sixteen who taught me among other things that the life of the actor is lonely. He was not wrong, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

The creative life project is like a harbour, where we as artists can compare notes and know that although we may be alone, we’re not really alone.

There are other pioneers searching for a way to make an impact, for a way to extend their passion into the lives of others, crashing into shores, building themselves up again, and setting out to the unknown.

Thanks for having me.

Victor: I’ve spent years foregoing travel opportunities to wait for that big audition that may skyrocket me into stardom.